THE THOUGHT FOR THE DAY IS......
January 30th 2007 06:26
THE THOUGHT FOR THE DAY IS.........IF I DONT WANT TO BE ME TODAY.....WHOELSE CAN I BE ...................................??????
I am having trouble stringing a sentence together today. I piked out of the pap smear yesterday, had no trouble spending the long appointment I had booked talking to the Doctor about my referral to a Psychologist (Thanks Mr Howard for the new medicare initiative), my outpatient treatment ad naueum etal.
Caught the train out west last night and stayed with a woman who I met in the hospital, she was having a dinner party, and I was invited to stay as it is a bit of a hike from my place.
We tried to take her dogs for a relaxing walk beside the river but the police had the river bank cordoned off and there was a minibus load of young looking officers doing a search then two Polair Choppers turned up and went up and down till sunset, nothing on the news, so buggared if I know what they were looking for.
Anyhow, last night was my first dinner party in years without being totally or even slightly intoxicated and you know what, it sucked........big time. I couldnt relate to any of the other guests apart from the people I knew from hospital. The food was really fantastic home cooked Italian...Antipasto, Suppli, some other woggy things, pasta, salad, a dead chook, a lump of some part of a dead cows arse, baked eggplant, tiramisu, and I got to have some tiramisu today for breakfast just because I could. I coudnt relax at dinner, I felt like I had been transplanted on an alien planet or the western suburbs. I felt really uncomfortable and overate and drank too much coffee and ate more, then went for a walk but I couldnt go too far cos the police still had a cordone, (buggared if I know what they are looking for), and snuck off to the spare room and went to bed.
I then lay in bed for hours lamenting that I am unable to talk to strangers if I am sober then debating with myself about the fact that if I was pissed I would probably have told them to get fucked or something else charming. I tend to forget that I was often invited over for dinner or out, usually once only.
I was woken this morning early by the return of the Police Helicopters and this time there was a Police Dive Boat as well as a mini bus load of officers, so they still hadnt found whatever it was and there's still nothing on the news.......
Anyhow the ex rang me again today while I was having a 15min free massage in a massage chair display at the local shopping centre, which was unusual, (the ex calling not me going to shopping centres and pretending I am interested in buying massage chairs to get free massages). Turns out the ex was calling to find out if I was going to be going north anytime soon cos he's on a film shoot not far from my folks place until the end of March. I am as a matter of fact, he seems quite keen to catch up with me. Must not be pulling any chicks up there, and feeling a bit horn. Well we'll just have to see what happens and the state of play with my tatty brazilian when I get there.
Walking back from the station back in the city this afternoon, everybody seemed so bloody cheerful and I'm in a shit mood, real shit, everything is wrong, even though nothing in particular is and I felt like screaming, just opening my mouth and screaming. Got home and opened the freezer to get the coffee out and two frozen bottles of Heineken fell onto the floor and sprayed everywhere, if my flatmate was home I reckon I would have made him drink the flat beer was left in the bottle after they defrosted and lick the kitchen floor and walls clean, fucking idiot, I'm glad he's not home. I had to make do with a frosty email.
Well I am going to go out in search of Krispy Kreme Donuts, because when I have PMT this bad sugar is the only solution........And I still dont know what the police where looking for.....
I am having trouble stringing a sentence together today. I piked out of the pap smear yesterday, had no trouble spending the long appointment I had booked talking to the Doctor about my referral to a Psychologist (Thanks Mr Howard for the new medicare initiative), my outpatient treatment ad naueum etal.
Caught the train out west last night and stayed with a woman who I met in the hospital, she was having a dinner party, and I was invited to stay as it is a bit of a hike from my place.
Anyhow, last night was my first dinner party in years without being totally or even slightly intoxicated and you know what, it sucked........big time. I couldnt relate to any of the other guests apart from the people I knew from hospital. The food was really fantastic home cooked Italian...Antipasto, Suppli, some other woggy things, pasta, salad, a dead chook, a lump of some part of a dead cows arse, baked eggplant, tiramisu, and I got to have some tiramisu today for breakfast just because I could. I coudnt relax at dinner, I felt like I had been transplanted on an alien planet or the western suburbs. I felt really uncomfortable and overate and drank too much coffee and ate more, then went for a walk but I couldnt go too far cos the police still had a cordone, (buggared if I know what they are looking for), and snuck off to the spare room and went to bed.
I then lay in bed for hours lamenting that I am unable to talk to strangers if I am sober then debating with myself about the fact that if I was pissed I would probably have told them to get fucked or something else charming. I tend to forget that I was often invited over for dinner or out, usually once only.
I was woken this morning early by the return of the Police Helicopters and this time there was a Police Dive Boat as well as a mini bus load of officers, so they still hadnt found whatever it was and there's still nothing on the news.......
Anyhow the ex rang me again today while I was having a 15min free massage in a massage chair display at the local shopping centre, which was unusual, (the ex calling not me going to shopping centres and pretending I am interested in buying massage chairs to get free massages). Turns out the ex was calling to find out if I was going to be going north anytime soon cos he's on a film shoot not far from my folks place until the end of March. I am as a matter of fact, he seems quite keen to catch up with me. Must not be pulling any chicks up there, and feeling a bit horn. Well we'll just have to see what happens and the state of play with my tatty brazilian when I get there.
Walking back from the station back in the city this afternoon, everybody seemed so bloody cheerful and I'm in a shit mood, real shit, everything is wrong, even though nothing in particular is and I felt like screaming, just opening my mouth and screaming. Got home and opened the freezer to get the coffee out and two frozen bottles of Heineken fell onto the floor and sprayed everywhere, if my flatmate was home I reckon I would have made him drink the flat beer was left in the bottle after they defrosted and lick the kitchen floor and walls clean, fucking idiot, I'm glad he's not home. I had to make do with a frosty email.
Well I am going to go out in search of Krispy Kreme Donuts, because when I have PMT this bad sugar is the only solution........And I still dont know what the police where looking for.....
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